Will He/She Ever Love Me???

This is a question that psychics, empaths, and tarot readers get asked a lot. Being a woman who has loved and lost at various points in my life, I can say that I totally understand why so many people want to know this when they get a reading about the people they love. We can all become deeply attached to the love we feel for another and experience strong desires to have that love returned to us. At it's core it is as natural as the mother/child bond, but in love relationships...as well as within the mother/child bond...love and loving choices towards another is not always returned, sustained, or expressed.

In many ways, when we ask if someone will ever love us, we are asking if a person will ever change. Regardless of a readers prediction about that question, it's always up to the individual because we all have free will and can change or not change at any time. Sometimes the question arises from the desire to know if we should hold on when things are rough...we want validation on whether things will change out of fear of letting go too soon. Or other times we may ask because we want to be loved so badly by a specific person, even when they treat us in a way that makes us feel bad. If we can get someone to tells us that we will be loved eventually by that person, then we can use that to trick our brains into not feeling the pain of their present lack of love for us. The pain we would naturally feel if we didn't have outside assurance from a psychic reader telling us that one day we will be loved by them. If we allow ourselves to feel the pain of our current reality then we allow life to work action and change into our lives...which is what we really need when we are not loved in a relationship.

Even though I understand the yearning behind the question of "will they ever love me?", I have to say that I also think it's one of the most distracting and destructive questions you can ask and focus on when seeking guidance from a psychic or tarot reader. No prediction...not even from the best psychics around... is 100% reliable when it comes to affairs of the heart, because all people have free will to change their minds and a lot of times psychics pick up on energy that the person in question isn't even conscious of within themselves...and an unconscious person cannot be relied upon to act in a predictable way. Most importantly, it totally gets you away from what is happening today, and your happiness rests in what you are living and putting energy towards right now.

Love means a lot of different things to different people. Someone may have feelings of love for you, but they may not choose to be with you or life circumstances are such that they can't. You may feel comfort knowing that they at least love you, but if you aren't feeling that directly from the other person then what you are doing is experiencing it vicariously through your reader...and that is not love...you deserve more than a vicarious experience of love...you deserve the real thing. Not only do you deserve it, but it's what your soul wants because that is what is healing to humans...love. So trying to feel it through others only keeps you connected to a blocked source of love rather than letting you heal from your disappointment and move on so you can find love in a person who is willing and able to share it with you directly.

If you are left with the belief that one day someone who isn't behaving lovingly towards you now, will be loving towards you in the future...you are vulnerable to putting up with a lot of non-loving behavior waiting for the love to come. You shouldn't have to wait for love...it is either there or it is not and if you have to ask for outside confirmation about that love, then there is a good chance that it is not there, or the person is choosing to not share it...in which case you are better off to accept it, grieve, and move on.

When we look at things as they are today and make our choices for ourselves based on that, and not on future predictions, then we begin to set the stage for love to enter our life. When we let go of a relationship that is not showing us love right now, we make space for a relationship that can be loving to enter. We are telling the Universe...I am not going to wait around and settle for a possible future prediction of love...and the Universe will support that.

Usually when we do choose to wait around for a person who is being unavailable with their love, it might be a way of avoiding real relationships. Real "in-your-face -right-now" relationships can bring up even more fears and uncertainty than a "future-maybe-hopefully- one-day-I-will-love-you" relationship because that kind of relationship requires you to be seen and known by another person right now. It asks for levels of emotional and sexual intimacy that might be uncomfortable, especially of we have been hurt in the past.

So understand your past and affirm your right to an available and loving future...and in the meantime consider asking your adviser about how you can be most loving to yourself at this time. The guidance and insight you receive from that question will carry you much closer to a true and lasting love, then a prediction about if he/she will ever love you.

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading :-)
Amanda

Please visit http://EmpathicAmanda.com
for more information on my services.

 




Or get a FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting
http://EmpathicMystic.com

Why Does This Always Happen To Me?

This is a question that many of us have asked ourselves throughout our journey in life, especially in the moments when we are hurting the most...that is hurting the most AGAIN! 

If you're finding that you are asking yourself "Why does this always happen to me?" once again, then it is a good idea to take the question seriously and start listening and watching for the answer, because it will come to you if you are willing to pay it the attention it deserves.

As an intuitive psychic, empath, and tarot reader I understandably hear these kinds of questions a lot. Why me? Why now? Why AGAIN!?!? 

It's important to remind ourselves in these moments of wondering that life is not punishing you...it is simply trying to wake you up to a pattern that you are participating in and may continue to play out until you learn the lessons it is trying to teach you. Waking up to a pattern can feel uncomfortable and disorienting, but once you see and understand the pattern you instantly have the opportunity to go from sad and angry victim to wise and empowered creator. When you know what your pattern is you have the power to choose differently and begin having better experiences in your life.

Two common patterns that I see repeat in people's lives is infidelity and mean bosses. I'm sure many of you reading can relate...You meet the most awesome and funny guy or gal in the whole world, you get close, you fall in love and BAM he or she cheats on you with another person...or you leave your old job because your boss was such a major B#%CH who seemed to get off on regularly humiliating you, only to find your new boss makes the old wicked witch boss look like a beloved camp counselor! And the saddest, most frustrating, part of all is that in both cases...this isn't even the first time that this has happened to you!

More often than not, these and other patterns are the result of your unconscious mind guiding you to experiences that will wake you up to what relationship dynamics were present in your own family and household growing up. Many people who cheat and are cheated on in relationships had parents that cheated and lied or were cheated on and lied to in their relationships and that dynamic created an impact and has left an imprint on the person experiencing that in their life now. Or sometimes it is a pattern that originates from having to compete with siblings to get love and approval from the adults in a person's life. Many people who experience their bosses as being overly critical and hateful towards them had at least one controlling or manipulative parent growing up.

As much as we all like the idea of "letting the past be the past", it will often times follow us around until we finally decide to face it and deal with who and what hurt us growing up. On a spiritual and psychological level, that is what the cheating boyfriends and the mean boss' of the world are trying to make you aware of...that you still have unresolved hurts and they need your help in being healed.  When we take the time to consciously grieve and release the hurts from the past we free ourselves from the soul karma of having to become conscious of the original pain and experiences that may have left us feeling less whole and complete in this life.  As human beings our bodies, hearts, and minds are designed to heal...so doing conscious healing work has a pay off...freedom from the same old pain we've been encountering over and over again!  Releasing the hurt from the past creates space for new joy, new lessons and new types of people to enter our life.

Healing and understanding these kinds of past hurts and patterns will be a big part of what I explore in my blog, so if you are interested in learning more, be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed so you can be kept up-to-date

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading :-)
Amanda

Please visit http://EmpathicAmanda.com for more information on my services.

Or get a FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://EmpathicMystic.com

You Deserve Your Own Love

Self Love...now there's a concept for ya, huh?

If you're into self improvement you have probably heard or read those two words together a lot. A few lucky folks are tried and true pros at it! Most of us attain Self-Love when we are alone or feeling safe, but can allow outer chaos or other people to fog our brain and forget why we were lovable to begin with. Many of us like the sound of it, but don't exactly know what it looks or feels like. There are some who get bitter at the mere thought of it and prefer to remain the victim of feeling no love at all.

If you are anything like me, you dip in and out of all of the above when it comes to Self-Love.

I've found that the secret key to maintaining Self-Love in life is to focus on the FACT that you DESERVE your own love...no matter what...and especially when you are feeling a lack of it.

Deservedness is key, because if you believe that you DON'T deserve it than you will not have it within you or by your side at the times when you need it most. The more you get use to it (and know how to maintain it) the less you find yourself in situations that trigger Self-Love's opposite: Self-Loathing. Nobody deserves that...natural remorse or brief periods of shame...sure, we all mess up and need to learn from our mistakes at times, but never Self-Loathing.

Self-Love is a birth right, just like the fact that you were given a body to live in, eyes that produce tears, and a mind to make choices with. It is naturally there for the taking, regardless of what life situation or family you were born in or find yourself in currently. The beautiful thing about Self-Love is that it is infinite...so no matter where you stand with it right now, you can always nurture and grow into a state of being that supports, motivates, and comforts you at all times in this life.

It's also natural to give love and seek love from others. We are biologically and psychologically designed to do this for survival.

This may not sound super romantic or spiritual. Don't get me wrong...I am a huge fan of romantic and spiritual love, but there is good truth around the nature of love in biology and psychology that we can all learn from.

We are designed to give love and seek love as babies so we will be loved back and have our basic survival needs taken care of by the adults in our lives. It creates a bond that carries us through life's harsher realities. Unfortunately, this instinctual programing can set us up for confusion later in life...especially if the adults in our life did not teach us the important emotional survival skill of Self-Love.

This gets overlooked a lot, mainly because societies and cultures (and therefore families) are designed in various ways that focus more on physical survival...food, clothes, shelter...which governments and businesses then capitalize on, for better or for worse, to create an economy that sustains a community or a nation. Because of this, emotional needs have been downgraded for generation after generation because a.) emotions can be time consuming and uncomfortable to deal with and b.) that process can get in the way of taking care of our physical survival needs...the field needs to be plowed, mom has to work, the boss will fire you if you miss work due to depression, etc...so we learn to devalue our feelings and sometimes block them out completely just to keep moving.

This leads us into an adulthood where we are both consciously and unconsciously always trying to give or receive love from others because it is what we have always done to survive. We have an instinct for love/sex and we know that often times there is safety in numbers. When it is working it feels really great! Nothing wrong with it...BUT because so few people were taught how to love themselves properly and are pushed to focus on their physical survival above all else, a lot of the love we give and receive and the choices we make ultimately lead us to feelings of loss and longing for something more than what we are able to give or are getting from others.

Now throw into the mix that many of our great-grandparents, grandparents, parents, and even ourselves have been the victims of war, illness, abandonment, divorce, death, incarceration and all sorts of abuses...and still expected to survive, given little if any real time to grieve and heal themselves before entering back into a “normal” life. Who has time for learning and teaching Self-Love in all that emotional chaos...best to try and just find happiness however we can, right?

This can often times creates a sense of urgency to fill void of emptiness and confusion that we have never learned how to manage in a balanced self-loving way. This is why addictions are so strong in humans...most are a quick and effective fix on feeling both bonded to others and love towards ourselves (drugs, alcohol, ambition, love, sex, cigarettes, fitness, materialism, etc.) at least for a time.

These fixes come at a cost because most highs are fleeting, they have consequences that we do not yet understand (or are able to ignore) and will not permanently fill anything. Addictions distract us from whatever pain we are trying to manage...which is usually the pain we experience when we do not feel Self-Love in the face of life's challenges. When we are challenged we often feel weak and unacceptable to others which creates the toxic belief that we don't deserve any love, much less our own love.

Most of our beliefs have been taught to us by the people, experiences, and the world around us. If you were never actively taught how to genuinely love yourself and are experiencing the pain and suffering of this lost lesson, don't despair. It can be self-taught and the learning process is actually very fun once you stop resisting that its time to own up to what has been missing in your life and give it to yourself.

When trying to learn Self-Love please remember...write it down, sing it out loud, or pay someone to remind you of it if you have to...that YOU DESERVE YOUR OWN LOVE!

Start there.

Self-Love will look different for everyone in its inner and outer expression. At its core though, it is like a kind, gentle, often times silly and nurturing energy that we tend to feel towards babies...or kittens...or puppies...you get the idea. Think innocence and purity. Good spirituality is a great path to Self-Love. Having a higher power that loves and accepts us and encourages us to grow is a righteous mirror to our own possibilities of loving ourselves daily in that same light.

You can give yourself love by doing things that you love to do and having experiences that don't come with hard consequences...hobbies that make you happy. You also must consciously choose to speak kindly towards yourself both inside your mind and aloud to others. If you don't know how to start or what to say follow me and insert your full name where I have put mine: “I, Amanda Elaine Monyhan, Deserve My Own Love” and soon you will begin to feel, see, and understand why this is so. It is your birth right after all and it has been waiting for you to know your name with love in your heart from the moment you were born.

Original Art for the Self Love card in the Empatic Mystic Online Tarot http://EmpathicMystic.com

Please remember to follow along either via Google/Blogger or Facebook...more Art of Self Love to come.  Thank you for reading and be kind to yourself :-)

Amanda

Please visit http://EmpathicAmanda.com for more information on my services.

 




Or get a FREE Reading using the  Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://EmpathicMystic.com

Why Does This Always Happen To Me?

This is a question that many of us have asked ourselves throughout our journey through life, especially in the moments when we are hurting the most...AGAIN! If you are finding that you are asking yourself "Why does this always happen to me?" once more, then it is a good idea to take the question seriously and start listening and watching for the answer, because it will come to you if you are willing to pay it the attention it deserves.

As an intuitive psychic, empath, and tarot reader I understandably hear these kinds of question a lot. Why me? Why now? Why AGAIN!?!? It's important to remind ourselves in these moments of wondering that life is not punishing you...it is simply trying to wake you up to a pattern that you are participating in and may continue to play out until you learn the lessons it is trying to teach you. Waking up to a pattern can feel uncomfortable and disorienting, but once you see and understand the pattern you instantly have the opportunity to go from sad and angry victim to wise and empowered creator. When you know what your pattern is you have the power to choose differently and begin having better experiences in your life.

Two common patterns that I see repeat in people's lives is infidelity and mean bosses. I'm sure many of you reading can relate...You meet the most awesome funny guy or gal in the whole world, you get close, you fall in love and BAM he or she cheats on you with another person...or you leave your old job because your boss was such a major B#%CH who seemed to get off on regularly humiliating you, only to find your new boss makes the old wicked witch boss look like a beloved camp counselor! And the saddest, most frustrating, part of all is that in both cases...this isn't even the first time that this has happened!

More often than not, these and other patterns are the result of your unconscious mind guiding you to experiences that will wake you up to what relationship dynamics were present in your own family and house growing up. Many people who cheat and are cheated on in relationships had parents that cheated and lied or were cheated on and lied to in their relationships and that dynamic created an impact and has left an imprint on the person experiencing that in their life now. Or sometimes it is a pattern that originates from having to compete with siblings to get love and approval from the adults in a person's life. Many people who experience their bosses as being overly critical and hateful towards them had at least one controlling or manipulative parent growing up.

As much as we all like the idea of "letting the past be the past", it will often times follow us around until we finally decide to face it and deal with who and what hurt us growing up. On a spiritual and psychological level, that is what the cheating boyfriends and the mean boss' of the world are trying to make you aware of...that you still have unresolved hurts and they need your help in being healed.

Healing and understanding these kinds of past hurts and patterns will be a big part of what I explore in my blog, so if you are interested in learning more, be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed so you can be kept up-to-date

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading :-)
Amanda

Please visit http://EmpathicAmanda.com for more information on my services.

Or get a FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://EmpathicMystic.com

How Do I Love Myself?

How Do I Love Myself?

In a time of self-help books and with New Age thought entering the mainstream more and more, we all hear that we should love ourselves more from time to time. Sounds like a nice idea for most people, but if you are in the midst of angst and loss you might hear "Love Yourself More" and want to laugh, scream, and cry all at the same time. It seems like if we could just "Love Ourselves More" we would, right? I mean, who would go around and NOT love themselves if it were that easy? Or we may think, "I love myself a lot...I went on 2 vacations last year and re-did my entire living room, kitchen, and bathroom just this month." Or we may say "Hey, I dumped the crappy boyfriend and got a new job...if that is not self-loving then what is?"

Well, the idea of loving yourself is just as complex as the idea of loving another...there is no one simple way of looking at it...everyone has a varied understanding about what all constitutes "love"...be it of self or otherwise. Sometimes both seem impossible and scary to do, yet we find ourselves able to embrace it from time to time. And both can appear like mirages...elusive forms of loving feelings and loving actions that look and feel great at first, but in the end it leaves us feeling thirsty, empty and sometimes even addicted. When I think of healthy Romantic-Love and Self-Love I think of a dynamic that allows for an honest and compassionate relationship between our thoughts and our feelings that then translates into loving actions and choices.

Many of the people I speak to, as a reader, are going through some recent or current loss of a relationship. This seems to be the hardest time to love ourselves in a healthy way because we are feeling so abandoned, rejected, scorned, and lost. Someone who was connecting us with the energy of love is suddenly gone, and that can create a great feeling of emptiness inside. Many of us lose touch with our independent connection to love when we are in relationship with another...we merge so much that we lose sight of our unique love-light. Or maybe we never really had it in our sights to begin with and the relationship was the only source of love we felt. It is in moments like this that I encourage people to begin loving themselves more. It is in movements like this when it can feel like an impossible task at best, and a cruel joke at worst.

Sometimes when I advise my clients that they need to begin loving themselves more, they ask, "How??? How do I love myself more...what does that even mean???" I can understand their frustration over advice that sounds so simple, but can feel so monumental and abstract. My response is always the same...

To love yourself, you must first know yourself, and then you must accept what you know about yourself in the spirit of love.

Self-knowledge is a journey for life, so it is important to start with where you are and begin paying attention to all your thoughts and feelings. Begin keeping a journal. If you already do, begin reading old journals and writing about what you read. Get a therapist or talk with an advisor or a friend who will listen without judgment, but who may also be wise enough to give you compassionate feedback and insight into yourself. Read self-help books that deal with the issue that trouble you and with understanding family and childhood dynamics. I can recommend excellent books and resources, so feel free to email me if you would like some recommendations. All these things will help stimulate your awareness and understanding of yourself.

Self-acceptance can sometimes feel painful and uncomfortable. There is so much in society and families that teaches us to deny our true thoughts and feelings, that when we are finally ready to know and accept ourselves, it can sometimes feel foreign, conceited, or devious to do so. Or we may discover things about ourselves that we think we should never accept. This might indicate that we need to change our choices and behaviors and take responsibility for any harm we have done, but we still need to accept that this part of ourselves existed. If we don't then we will feel shame and guilt that will keep us from being able to love ourselves. I will talk more in a later blog about shame and guilt, but for now I will say that these two feelings are Self-Love's arch-enemies. Self-acceptance can also exist in the form of forgiveness, which is the thing that will dissolve feelings of shame and guilt, so we can be free to love ourselves and others. The spirit of love is very forgiving so know that you always have that available to you when you feel bad about yourself.

If we have been denying our good and worth for a long time, then the process of actively loving ourselves might take some time to get use to, but that is okay. It is worth the wait and the work involved. Consistently relating to ourselves in an honest, accepting, and compassionate way is the key to opening up to lasting joy and authentic relationships in our lives.

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading :-)
Amanda

Please visit http://EmpathicAmanda.com for more information on my services.

Or get FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://EmpathicMystic.com

If You Feel Grief, Don't Be Ashamed...Let It Out

If You Feel Grief, Don't Be Ashamed. Let It Out. Grief is one of those emotional experiences that is simply unavoidable in life. We all experience loss in one form or another, and yet I would say that avoiding grief is one of the most common things that I see people trying to do in their lives as a reader. So many people I read for hope to find a new relationship before they have fully grieved the loss of their last relationship. Often times the desire for new love is an attempt to dull or distract the person from the intense emotions that they have inside of them, but are trying not to feel. I also see people who have been deeply hurt in their childhood and have experienced an early loss of innocence and they have not allowed themselves to feel the grief about what they went through. Instead they focus on compensating for the past by focusing their sense of happiness on outer achievements or they may avoid their emotional life all together by getting lost in various addictions. There is no way around it...grief is necessary and painful. The deeper the loss or trauma experienced, the deeper the painful feelings go. It can feel confusing because we are faced with so many opposing emotions when we confront a loss. For example, after a divorce or break-up we may find that one minute we are bargaining with God to bring the person back and then the next we are so full of rage that we are grateful no one is around. Some days we may feel like nothing has changed at all and we are certain that it is only a matter of time before we are re-united and then other days we are crying non stop because we long so deeply for the past. All emotions are valid when you are grieving. It's not the emotions that create the problem for most people, it is when they have been suppressed, intellectualized, or minimized and sit locked up in the heart, mind, and body of the individual without being expressed and released. Often times grief gets set aside because we have to work, raise children, and basically stay functional in order to survive. Our culture doesn't embrace emotions enough as it is, much less taking 2-6 months to deeply explore our feelings and allow them their naturally chaotic path to acceptance and healing. It is understandable that so many people force their way through their grief, but it is not healthy and it creates new problems in the long run. When you don't let yourself grieve and go through an intense period of emotional release you are not allowing yourself to fully heal. That sadness and anger will find it's way into other areas of your life...your job, your relationship with your children, your friends, etc. Or it may make you sick. Emotions need to flow. When they don't our energy becomes stagnant and it starts to create blocks in how we choose to live and relate in the world. We may become fearful or angry and not know why. We may project our unresolved emotions onto our next relationship and expect our new partner to take away the pain. This simply is not how it works. These are your feelings about your experience of loss and they must be felt and released by you. It is important that we make the time to do so, even if the world around us isn't encouraging us to do so. When going through a grief process it is really important to have at least one person you can talk to about the different feelings that come up for you. Having a trusted person who can witness your emotions and be there to comfort you can give you the sense of safety you need to let out the feelings that seem too intense and difficult to feel on your own. You can also keep a journal of your feelings or join an online or in-person support group of others who are going through the same thing as you. Staying connected to others will allow for sharing which will help you heal faster. Moments of loss can also be an opportunity to connect more deeply with God, the Universe, or your high-self. A personal sense of spirituality can help fill in the gaps that the loss has left behind. Our connection with our Spirit is the one constant in life and Spirit always wants you to heal and grow from a loss because that is the only way you can continue creating a life for yourself that has purpose , joy, and meaning. If you are struggling with grief. Don't feel ashamed. It is a natural healing process and the more you allow it to be, the more you will come out the other side grounded and ready to embrace hope and happiness once more. Remember that you can be both strong and vulnerable at the same time. Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading. Amanda Please visit http://empathicamanda.com/ for more information on my services. You can call 1-888-MY-ETHER ext. 12345678 to speak with me directly (if I am available...if not, please email me for an appointment!) Or get a FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://empathicmystic.com/

Abandonment, Break-Ups, and Belonging

Break-ups are hard...there is just no way around that fact. Oftentimes breaking up is hard, even when YOU are the one ending it! Even when you know breaking up is the best thing in the world that you could do for yourself, it can be painful and emotionally disorienting. Break-ups, of all kinds...from the agreeable friendly kind to the knock-down-breakdown kind...are likely to bring up our abandonment and belonging issues.

Regardless of how long the relationship lasted, it is likely that for a time you felt a sense of "belonging" with this person. A feeling of completion and connection that made you feel safe, known, and wanted...if only for a short time. If it's a longer relationship than these feelings of belonging were likely to be more deeply etched into your psyche. When that feeling is "taken" from us in a break-up or we decide to remove ourselves from it, then it is likely to trigger abandonment feelings both in the moment, but also any that we have experienced in the past.

So many people have experienced some form of abandonment in their childhood. It could have happened in the form of divorce, death, a parent leaving the family, traveling, work, war, addiction, abuse, adoption, etc. A lot of times relationships ending can be especially painful for people who have suffered a big abandonment in their childhood. When we are little, we often times will suppress our hurt, scared, angry, confused, betrayed, and sad feelings in relationship to the loss in order to survive and get through it.

Suppressed feelings don't go away. They just hang out in the places of our memory that go unnoticed by our conscious mind. This hiding place is what a lot of healers, therapists and mystics call the Shadow. When we experience difficult moments that take us out of our day to day stream of (and striving for) happiness...like a breakup...we begin to emotionally dip into the suppressed memories and feelings of the past, which makes the feelings in the "here and now" even more intense. It is normal and natural to do this, especially if you have experienced a trauma.

Abandonment is traumatizing to children because we are naturally attached to our parental figures because we have a primal need to have that bond...so it is nothing to be ashamed of, yet a lot of us do feel shame and may not even be aware of it. There can be a lot of shame associated with being abandoned because we lose our sense of belonging and that can make us feel unwanted and different than others and so, in order to cope, we learn to hide and minimize the feelings we have as kids all the way into adulthood.

This suppressed shame can explain why we so often feel a sense of shame when someone breaks up with us or we are unable to make a relationship work...we feel ashamed for being "unwanted" and we feel shame in not being able to make a relationship last or having made a poor choice in a mate. If you have never felt abandoned emotionally or physically in your past then you are rare and lucky! You may still have some abandonment and shame feelings come up though. For you it may be a different kind of intensity that is linked with the unfamiliar shock of someone choosing to not be in a relationship with you or you may worry that you are not living up to the potential of your families reputation/tradition for having solid and sound relationships.

Once we understand the full scope of why we feel the way we do, we can begin healing the core stuff that led us to this experience in the first place. Our suppressed and unconscious grief from past abandonment can attract to us similar experiences through relationships with people who will play out the previous drama with us. I believe this is orchestrated by our spirits so we can become conscious of what needs healing in us through the experience of pain. Pain causes us to grow when we would rather just stay the same.

No one wants to go through life with a conscious or unconscious feeling of abandonment, shame, and a sense of not belonging in the world. When a break-up triggers these feelings in us we have the choice to grow bitter or depressed and live as a victim, or we can feel our feelings and learn how to be there for ourselves. We can learn how to feel a sense of belonging from within. We can comfort the inner-child that still feels hurt and lost due to events of long ago. It is amazing what a little awareness and allowing of feelings can do for a person.

The process of healing from a past abandonment and a present break-up can feel and look messy, but it is fertile ground for personal and spiritual growth. As we heal our wounds and let go of shame we grow into whole adults who are conscious and ready to have relationships that last. The first step towards creating that is in mending your relationship with yourself through understanding what experiences and events have left behind a residue of grief that needs to be consciously felt, expressed, and let go of.

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading :-)

Amanda

Please visit http://empathicamanda.com/ for more information on my services. You can call 1-888-MY-ETHER ext. 12345678 to speak with me directly (if I am available...if not, please email me for an appointment!)

Or get a FREE Reading using the Empathic Mystic Online Tarot by visiting http://empathicmystic.com/